Wanting

I've realized this a couple times and now I am realizing it again. I decided a while back that if I could not get what I wanted, that I would try not wanting anything so that I would like whatever I got. Well, it seems like a good idea (sort of) but it doesn't really work that way. I guess I simply replaced wanting things like new clothes, a pair of shoes, a new surfboard or wetsuit, a hot girlfriend, etc. with wanting to not want. Eventually I replaced (or added to) wanting to not want with wanting to feel good regardless of what is going on. I don't know, I guess I had been told enough times that I can choose (control?) how I feel that I started to believe that I can do it regardless of the circumstances and that I can do it right now. I don't think we can control how we feel. I don't think we can even choose how to feel. I think feelings are automatic reactions to thoughts, which are products of our past and present. You cannot control what thought comes into your mind. You can't make a thought leave either. Therefore, I believe you can't control how you feel. I do think you can make choices that will help you to accept how you feel and therefore, learn to feel in a way more conducive to how you would like to feel. Ugh, I'm hungry, I'm going to leave it at that.